we both felt like we got one step closer. we both said "let's just live the dream. and, if it turns out to be impractical or terrible, or lame to go 20 mph up a mountain pass, we can sell it. at least we'll know." you could compare this 1984, loud, no a/c, slightly gas-y smelling van to someone else's brand new mercedes, we love it so much. we love the way it sways a little as you take a turn; we love the way it sounds when you turn it on and it rumbles a little. and, most of all, we love that you can sleep in it. but to be a little more contemplative, more than the actual van itself, i love that this van symbolizes God's faithfulness and intimacy once again. it's been a hard journey these last few months. perhaps it is how full life has been with a newborn and lack of sleep, trying to sell our house, and attending to the not-so-shiny parts of casey and i's marriage. perhaps it is just a season we need to walk through. but with the arrival of this van, fun has entered our spirits. i feel like the lord has given us fresh air to breath in. even just space to breath period. casey cannot stop smiling, asher cannot spend enough time in the "camper bus," and i cannot get enough of the giant steering wheel and how i smile when i get to take the van for a drive. we are suddenly focusing on road trips and camping excursions, and that is fun. maybe i am being hormonal or oversimplifying. but i am thankful the lord knows us intimately, and that his intimacy showed up as a vanagon.
